Why do I suffer?
A friend, (let's call her Gail), sent me an text one day. Gail found it hard to understand another friend's long standing grief over the loss of her son. Like most of us in our world today, I've stumbled through seasons of anguish and pain that have left me gasping. I've experienced waves of deep grief crashing over me in a torrent that could not be stopped. I have discovered that sorrow has its own time-table. So I could well empathise with Gail's friend.
On the day I received Gail's message, I too had been struggling. My health was in shambles and I was deeply discouraged. Gail's text sharing how victorious her Christian life was, made me feel a failure. Was I a bad Christian? Later that day, I enjoyed a conversation with a different friend; let's call her Joyce. Joyce and I empathised with each another. We were both going through tough circumstances, so could share our struggles freely, knowing the other would understand. We held hands as it were over the phone line, bound by the same Holy Spirit with a faith that grew through our disclosures and with hearts drawn closer to our Saviour through our suffering.
If I'd told my friend Gail of my struggles, she might have questioned if I was a good enough Christian. But was she right? Does everything in our lives need to be lined up in neat rows, for us to be shining witnesses for Jesus? Does a difficult life indicate a lack of faith? Is God's favour displayed only when I enjoy a trouble-free existence? On the contrary, I've read countless stories of heroes of faith who testified to the reality of Christ in the midst of their persecution, loss or trouble. In actual fact, their witness was all the more radiant because of the adversities they were going through.
Jesus was a man of suffering, acquainted with grief! St Paul underwent untold hardship. "Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was pelted with stones, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my fellow Jews, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false believers. I have laboured and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked." 1 Cor 11:25-27
When I read that account, my own tale of woe, disappears in a puff of smoke! St Paul was a man following God's call on his life to bring others to God. Shouldn't God make things easy for him then, so he could share the gospel freely? I do not believe that we Christians are called to a pain-free life. On the contrary I know that part of our calling as disciples of Jesus is to suffer. "To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps." 1 Peter 2:21
So ... in case you are feeling the pressure of failure, heartache, pain or the untold rigors of a tough season, let me reassure you. Suffering does not make you a bad Christian. Not at all! When you suffer according to God's will, suffering can be a cloak of honour you can wear around your shoulders with joy. Suffering often refines our faith just like fire purifies silver. Suffering helps us understand others' pain. It propels us into the arms of Jesus. Suffering also often brings us closer to one another.
For 16 difficult years as I've struggled with often debilitating pain and fatigue, I've wondered if Jesus could understand my despair ... his suffering was in days rather than the decades I've been through! But one beautiful day God answered my question through scripture. "Surely he took up our pain and bore our suffering." Isaiah 53:4! My eyes were opened wide - those words said it all! He bore my suffering, not only my sins. Thank you Jesus! I just cannot begin to comprehend what Jesus must have endured, taking on the pain and sin and suffering of all the whole world. Can you? Finally ... I see clearly.
My own weaknesses have shown me how human I am and how much I need God. My own seasons of anguish have brought me to my knees, seeking God as never before. And I have found Him. I've had a glimpse of His glory. His goodness. His grace. His mercy. His compassion. His love. And what joy! My suffering has led me to eternal treasures from the Hands of a Good Good Father!
If you are in a dark place today, God's heart of compassion reaches out to you. He doesn't always explain why we suffer but He is with us through each storm. If you are experiencing a season of difficulty (and the whole world is in that kind of season), do feel free to share with me and I will be glad to pray for you. May the Saviour's love enfold you today. May You know with certainty that underneath are the everlasting arms. He has promised to never leave you nor forsake you. As you look to Him, He will make good of every ounce of your suffering and turn it into glory.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God." 1 Cor 2:3-4
"Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matt 5:4
